“But I’m a cheerleader”

As long as I can remember I’ve liked girls. This probably started off when I was around 11 years old. Early bloomer I know. Good thing for me that it was girls or I would probably be preggers in high school and be on the MTV show, crazy and pregnant? No that’s not it. Oh yes teen mom, same difference. I have flashbacks from time to time of me and my next door neighbor doing some questionable things. My parents caught us and I remember how disgusted everyone seemed. I buried this so deep that I sometimes questions if it really happened. From that point and into my mid 20s I tried to fake it and pretend to be interested in guys. It’s been an uphill battle of drunken fakeness that still continues on and off today.

If you are like me and been fighting this internal battle you probably wanted to know about anyone who felt like you did or at least see a love story play out. Luckily the internet age allows us to connect now but growing up the internet was for AIM( AOL instant messengers for you chickens out there) & some questionable chat rooms that I was banded from . One “love story” I stumbled on was the movie “But I’m a Cheerleader.”  As you may have guessed from this fabulous title it is a movie about a girl who likes girls and doesn’t seem to know. When confronted by her family her response to getting sent to what I will call, get straight camp, was “But I’m a cheerleader.” I think it won a golden globe?

Anyways I did not make any major life changes as a result of the wonderful content from this movie but this title did stick. I changed it to meet my point of view to “But I’m a sorority girl.”  Not only am I a sorority girl but I was the head sorority girl in my college. Because of this and my drunken need to kiss anyone good looking it made it pretty easy to fly under the radar. I am coming up on my 30th birthday and like most females my age my friends are either engaged, married, or with child. I am sure they have their own thoughts on me but for the most part they probably believe I am career hungry kissing slut who doesn’t need anyone. Semi accurate.

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